Next to me lies the sleeping body who's inhabitant is desperately hot from this summer heat. Blech. We're only used to so many of these a year. Taking it's cue from yesterday, it is over 95 degrees today. I worry more about Miss Humanling in the heat because it seems that the heat can be a biotch with epilepsy.
We've had a good week or two, which is always much appreciated (thank you God, Universe, Aliens, Starlight!) That's not to say that she hasn't woken up vulnerable....I've just been able to kick her tiny butt into gear and get her on her feet before anything major happens. Thankfully most of the time she listens. (Did I really say that?)
She got her yearbook the other day and was showing me all the kids who were in this club or that club. She is in none. She doesn't seem to have the stamina to be in a club for too long but every year we do like Frosty the Snowman...."HAP-PY BIRTH-DAY!" and start all over again. Sometimes I feel bad that I'm the closest buddy she seems to have. Like we're going to be that old mother and daughter couple that walk down Main Street with bags or a cart. Zombie expressions on our face and gibberish falling out of our mouths and staining our shirts. Not even a good cruise can cure that.
I chose the most important time to talk to her about well...creating room for other people in her life. I mentioned how I have always had a best friend (or two!) and how we did EVERYTHING together. I left out the prank phone calls, experimental smoking, meeting guys at the mall that we followed to an intimate party of four and the time that we took two strange guys into our car right after a Ratt concert and then drove around the whole time looking for their car without actually getting to have any fun with them.
I told her that there are things she can only learn from girls her own age. That it's so important to have friends - a group of friends. But I'll settle for one best friend for her. It seems that everytime she reaches out her knighting wand, she chooses another child that ends up telling whoopers or having a home life that involves DCYS. It's like I want to put an ad in the paper and set her up. I don't know if she is just prone to enjoying solitude and the company of such a kick ass cool mom like me, or if she comes off as strange to those around her. Tough with epilepsy...sometimes you just can't tell. Is it the personality? The medicine? Do people with epilepsy view the world in such a way that others can't relate, due to any difference in cognitive abilities? She is an odd child, after all. But I am not really so typical either. So maybe she just is a chip off the ol' mama and the kids in school aren't ready for that. Or maybe they are and she is just not ready for acceptance.
The factors make me dizzy. But in telling her that I'd love her to get new friends in the coming year, she replied, "Like Jack from Statefarm?" Yes, like Jack from Statefarm. (See commercial above). "She sounds hideous."
There certainly are reach outs though by others. Such as when she performed in the Talent Show and took the stage alone to sing "Breaking Free" from High School Musical. She received a standing ovation. Or today...a fabulous break. She didn't know it but during the award ceremony this morning, she was getting an award for steppin' it up for Chorus. Her chorus teacher called me yesterday to let me know so that I could show up and let her die of embarrassment. Front row baby....I'd be the one with the pom poms and t-shirt with her face on it. YEAH!!!
But the reality of the end result of the continuous talk about seeking out good friends came down to her citing a friend she had years ago who barely calls her back, ever. "I like Jordan and she's my friend. NOW GIVE ME FIFTY PUSHUPS!"
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